Made it Private!

Hello!!

Sorry for the e-mail!  I thought when I was adding viewers from my contacts, it would just allow you to view without actually inviting you, so you don't have to read this at all, lol.  I was just getting a weirdly large amount of views from Russia...so I thought I would make my blog private.  

So yeah sorry about that!  

-Steph

They Gon' Cut Me Up

Mmmyyeelllowwwss againss!!

Long time.  

My bad.  

So it's been kind of an eventful month!  I went to Scotland for a week with my parents and IT. WAS. AMAZING.  I am so in love with Scotland.  I want to move there.  Right now.  

Everything was just so great.  Even just the whole European atmosphere is really nice.  And even though I spent the whole time trying to not be super self conscious about being overweight in Europe and trying not to be either like a walking example of obesity in America, or just an obnoxious American tourist or something...

...I loved it so much.  

It's just an overall healthier environment over there!  Everything is smaller. The cars, the streets, the people, the portion sizes, the doorways, etc.  The soda sizes at the store are way smaller.  All of the meats and eggs are like "free range" or "happy eggs".  And they make you feel super terrible about not buying the more expensive organic stuff because the cheaper eggs are on the side, but they say "NOT free range" on them. And you'll probably get lots of dirty looks if you buy them.  I think we forget sometimes how big everything is here.  I'm convinced it's the whole "gold fish will grow to meet the size of the tank" type of thing why we're all large people.  But I still love my country and we're still awesome and a great land of opportunity and we're very privileged.  Even if in 50 years we're all in Hoveround chairs.  

But yeah.  Scotland.  

I loved everything about it, but mostly the scenery.  When you picture Scotland, you think green rolling hills and beautiful cloudy skies and just green, green GREEN.  

Well it's totally like that.  Like exactly.  

Yeah.  I know.  

And I went to a bunch of amazing castles and sites and it's just amazing, I put some pics on my Facebook with the descriptions on there and everything. It would take me way too long to go over everything.  Just - it was amazing and you should definitely go there if you have a chance.  

In other news. 

I am getting my surgery on Monday!!  2 days!!!

If you recall, (or don't recall, whatever), I am getting bariatric surgery!  My dad got it over a year ago and I am following in his footsteps to a healthier life!  I am really excited.  The procedure that I'm getting is the gastric sleeve procedure where they cut out like 70% of my stomach.  Super interested? Well if so, the Michigan Bariatric Institute put this video up on their Facebook page about it and it's pretty cool!

Anywho. 

So I've been prepping for that this summer with lots of preparatory tests and procedures, and right now I have to shrink my liver with 5 days of only eating 1000 calories and 3 days of just clear liquids.  It's not too bad if you eat enough protein!  But then the food ads come up on TV and I kind of get ravenous. But otherwise, not too bad.  

But I mean come on, how could you last with this in your face?

Stupid Dominos.  

So basically I'll be eating very little and working up to more solid foods after the surgery and eventually, like my dad, I'll get to the point where you are pretty much able to eat whatever you want, but just smaller portions.  

There are so many things I am looking forward to with the weight loss.  And I know, it's not like I just get this surgery and just sit back and not do anything while I magically become Ms exercise and fitness. Mmmno.  It's gonna be hard work and I'm gonna have to make sure I stay on top of my exercise, like it's my job, and making sure I eat right and enough protein and all sorts of things.  It's going to be a life-changing experience and it's gonna require a lot of maintenance.

But yeah there are so many things I'm looking forward to like: fitting into smaller clothes, shopping in non-plus size stores, having more energy, not being reminded of my huge size every time I go to an amusement park or basically anywhere where I have to sit in seats, just feeling better about my appearance, and lots of other things.  And it's not like I'm going to become a totally different person when I lose weight or that I won't be self conscious at all or shy or whatever - but I think it will definitely make a difference.    

Bottom line, it's a kick in the pants to start living a healthier life.  Not too bad in my opinion.  

So this is what it did to my dad...

(Before & After, 1 year after surgery - Lost 103 pounds)

...so I'm hoping something similar will happen to me.  (While still knowing that I am a woman and we generally lose weight slower than men).  

So if I don't pass out and fall off a cliff due to my clear liquids diet before the surgery, bring it on!  And bring on the health!!  I'm ready for it.  

Oh, and this is how Iron Man 3 should have ended.  

(It's because.  I'm Batman!)

Right on.  

Honey, I'm home!

Mmmmyyyeeellloowwwss Michigan!!

Yayyy Michigan!!  I love Michigan.  It's nice and green and has beautiful summers and I love my house and it has good feelings of general home-ness.  I like being back.  

Mmyess I finally finished BYU and moved out of Utah and am living at home now with plans for nursing school, trip to Scotland and bariatric surgery.  And keeping my stupid job until I can get another one.  Geez.  

SO MOVING.  I hate moving.  Like a lot.  I stayed in the same apartment complex for 3 years mostly because I didn't feel like moving all my crap.  So now when I had to move all my stuff across the freakin country, it was ridiculous. I could only take two bags on the plane, (for free - woop woop Southwest!), and then mooch off of my family members to take the other 4 bags back for me.  And I am eternally grateful - shout out to Liz and Chris and Mom and Dad!

Yeah and then I had to ship a box with some stuff.  Dont.  Even.  Get.  Me.  Started.  I go to Uhaul and get a big box to put stuff in and plan to ship it - long story short - MOVING boxes are not the same as SHIPPING boxes.  And when they put the notice that these bigger boxes are best for like pillows and comforters and stuff - they're not kidding.  

So I stuff this XL box with all my heavy kitchen stuff and it ends up weighing about 70 lbs and when I break my back taking it to the post office and the lady basically says it's too big and the box starts to rip open at the bottom - I kind of have a mental breakdown.  Then I modify it and tape up all the corners with like 2 rolls of tape and ship it.  Next time - smaller boxes.  And driving.  Way easier in my opinion.  

ANYWAY.  

So yeah.  In the meantime, I'm just puttering around the house, hanging out with my parents, watching the birds, dreading my job still, and just trying to relax for the summer while still trying to make life plans so I don't feel like I'm mooching off my parents forever and become a bum who lives with her parents for the rest of her life.  (Even though that would be super great.  But not socially acceptable.  Whatever).  

So now I guess I'll just prepare for my trip to Scotland.  HECK.  YEAH.  

Did I mention we're going to Doune Castle?  You know, the one they used in like all the scenes from Monty Python?  Yeah.  Be jealous.  

Oh yeah and apparently they used it as the set of Winterfell in Game of Thrones.  I don't know which jokes and references to make while I'm there!  Excitement level - doubled.  

YESSS.  

I'm gonna be humming this song the whole time I'm there.  

And probably be quoting this scene...

Your mother was a hamster, and your father smelled of elderberries!


Right on.  

Ummmm......let's see....

Mmmyelllowwss 4am shift again! 

I wasn't gonna post because I don't really have anything to talk about, but I'm super bored and time isn't going fast enough.  So let's see what I can come up with.  

I go home exactly 3 weeks from today!!  I'm super excited and super terrified and stressed about packing and stuff.  Lots of change.  I don't like change.  But it's always been pretty good to me in the past, so let's see what it has in store.  Lots of relaxing, prepping for Scotland and my surgery, and then nursing school whenever and wherever I can do that.  And just being at home in Michigan will feel really, really good.  Even though I'm super sad about leaving peoples behind, I'm excited to leave Utah.  No offense, Utah, but four years is probably enough.  

So speaking of surgery!

Mmmyes!  I am scheduled to get bariatric surgery on August 5th.  I am getting the gastric sleeve procedure, which basically means they're cutting out 75% of my stomach.  Lovely huh?  :)  Click HERE for more info about it!  And that's the website with the doctor who's going to do it too!  Dr Zeni.  

So I know, doesn't this kinda contradict my past post about my weight, which was full of confidence and "we don't need to change" and "I'm awesome" - ness?  Contradiction?  Mmnop.  I don't think so.  

I've gone back and forth so many times about whether this is just an easy way out and I'm just too lazy to exercise so I'm just gonna have super life-altering surgery to fix my terrible eating and exercise habits.  But really, I've come to the conclusion that it's going to be a great idea.  

So my dad got this surgery just about a year ago.  The doctor basically told him if he wanted to live to see his grandchildren grow up, he would need to lose weight, especially with his diabetes.  And he did!  The surgery is actually pretty miraculous when it comes to diabetes.  It virtually disappears shortly after the procedure.  They don't really know why.  When my dad went in for his 6 month check-up, they asked him how his diabetes was going and he was like, "...oh yeah! I used to have that, huh?" hahahaha.  This is him: 

Ok he was like a super stud before the surgery anyway.  

But here he is less than a year later, more than 120 lbs (I think) thinner, no diabetes, no medications to take whatsoever, only multivitamins.  Yup.  Here he is at a 5K.  And that's a piece of cake for him.  He dominates 10K's during his normal workout routing....ees for fun!  He's such an awesome inspiration.  

So yeah!  This is what this surgery does haha, and I'm sure my results will differ and be slower than his.  And even though I'm younger and don't have any pressing health concerns...yet, this is a preventative surgery to just kick start me into living a healthier lifestyle overall.  

I've had bad eating habits all my life so this is how I see it going without the surgery.  I someday get around to exercising and I lose some weight and feel good, but maybe gaining some or more of it back eventually.  Then I'm gonna have kids and probably gain some more weight and then maybe lose some then gain some over the years, and then all of the sudden I'll be my dad's age, basically in the same situation.  

So let's just nip this in the bud shall we?

And, of course, I know it's not going to be a walk in the park.  It's a MAJOR life-changing procedure and I'm going to need to really work at exercising and staying healthy and working my life around it, but I have a great support system and I'm excited to get started on it.  So yeah.  :)

Mmkay 30 mins left in my shift.  So what else is goin on....

I'm going to see The Great Gatsby with my grandma today!!  I've been dying to see this movie.  It's by Baz Luhrmann, who did Moulin Rouge and Romeo + Juliet and I LOVE him and am dying to see how he does it.  I always really like his style.  

And Leonardo Dicaprio is just........Leonardo Dicaprio.  Yes.  

I read the book in high school, but didn't really like it that much.  My teacher kind of ruined it for everyone because she was OVERLY excited about it.  It was like her favorite book of all time and it was her favorite part of the class.  And she would like cry when she talked about it.  And so when I read it, I was like, "pshh sooooooooooooooooo overratteddddd, geez."  So yeah, I should probably read it again to give it another chance.  But I know the general story and I think it'll be super interesting how they portray it in the movie.  

I'M EXCITED!!

17 mins left..........

I'm gonna look for a funny video.  Give me a second....................

FOUND IT!

Bahahahahah I laughed so hard when I saw this.  This might be my post-bariatric surgery workout.  At least for the first little bit.  :)

Prancercise. 

Hilarious.  But I gotta say it's not as epic as this one.  

Jazzercise.  

Move your boogie body.  

Find it!  Feel it!  Do it!  All right yeahh!!


Woop! Shift's over.  

Right on.  

End of College Thoughts

Mmmyelloowwwss againnnsss!!

It's my 4am shift again!  And time isn't moving fast enough and people aren't being nice enough, so I'm gonna blog.  That usually helps.

Someday, I'm gonna have a job that doesn't make me hate weekends,  holidays, and people. Someday...

Anyways.

So I leave Utah to move back to Michigan in less than a month.  Guat?  Yeah I dunno.

It seems like just yesterday I was coming out here for my first year of college!  I don't understand how time works anymore.  Next thing you know, I'll be old and dead.  I should probably do some meaningful stuff before then, huh.

I actually went back and read a blog post I wrote about my first day at college and moving and stuff...it was a little depressing.  Geez.  But I remember that day!  I remember getting on the bus and it was packed and I was sweating like the whole day, (STORY. OF. MY LIFE. SERIOUSLY.), and I didn't know where my classes were in these weirdly-named buildings and I was still sweating the whole time.  And then my parents picked me up from campus because they were leaving to drive back to Michigan and they brought me tacos and then dropped me off in my apartment and left and I cried for like a million hours.  Especially since my roommate didn't like to turn on the A/C.  And I was sweating.  And crying.  Lots of moisture.

So yeah.  It's been quite the journey ever since then!  But holy crap I was not anticipating what kind of journey it'd be!  It's not just like - oh yeah let's just go to college and learn things and start a career and that's it ladidadida!  Yeah no one told me about all the other crap!  Yeah apparently you have to learn all these life skills and how to live independently and find some sort of social life and then all of the sudden decide whether you believe in God or not and what's the meaning of your life.

And then also get A's in your BYU classes.

Seriously!  There are so many adjustments/things to learn/life skills/life questions/etc that you have to figure out in this time of your life and all the while you have to balance school and a social life!  IT'S DIFFICULT.

So these are some of the things that were put onto my college life plate for me to digest.

1) Buy food/cook for yourself.  Sounds simple!  But I still have yet to become an expert at it.  How do you buy groceries just for 1 person?  I would end up buying a bunch of random ingredients for something to eat, but end up not having anything to eat.  There's only so much you can do with flour and frozen chicken and a 10 lb bag of potatoes.  And then I've heard that it's easiest if you plan out your meals for the week and buy the ingredients for those, and then it works out because you have a lot of leftover ingredients to work with to make other stuff!  I dunno.  And then sometimes I just buy Hot Pockets and Pringles and live off that for a week or two.

2) Being social in your ward.  Yup, never super mastered this one either.  Because no one likes the initial awkwardness of meeting people and talking in that happy-fake-voice without actually getting to know people  very well.  And, I know, that's totally part of the process and you get to know people better over time, but sometimes I wish I could just walk up to someone and be like - "Anchorman.  Seen it?"- and then go from there.  But whatever.  So yeah, I should've probably gone to more activities and I probably would've really met a lot of cool people and been super comfortable in the ward.  But it takes time and effort to get to that point and I guess I didn't put a lot of either into it.  Plus I already had a group of friends that I liked -but I didn't do much branching out.  Which was totally fine until they all moved away my last year hahahaha - yup I feel like I'm socially awkward now.

3) Going to class every day.  Oh geez this one killed my college career.  But yeah - you have to wake up on your own, sometimes at ungodly hours of the day, and go to a class of over 400 people that doesn't take attendance.  Yup that one was difficult.

And that's all I have to say about that one.

4) Career choice!  This one's a doozy! (...is that how you spell it?)  Yeah, you have to decide what you want to do for the rest of your life that you both enjoy and that will hopefully help you financially support yourself and your family if needed.  And hurry up cuz you have to take the right general ed classes for that specific field.  Yeah, I ended up taking like 5 classes that I didn't need after I decided on my major.  And don't get me wrong - I'm glad I could have time to explore and decide what I want and everything, but at the same time I'm like - man this probably could've been over a lot sooner if I had known.  So yeah when people tell you after graduating high school - oh don't worry! You have lots of time to decide what you want to do!  ...Yeah but it's kind of easier if you start thinking about it earlier...just sayin.  But then what if you're almost done with your major and you decide that you hate it??  Yayyy student loans foreverrr!!  Yeah, I dunno.

5) Faith/Meaning of Life Crisis!  So I feel like at some point during all of our lives we kind of sit down with ourselves and ask - what do I believe?  What's the purpose of my life?  Why am I here?  Do I believe the teachings I've been taught during my childhood?  And we all come up with different answers and go through different experiences trying to figure it out and everything and I feel like that's one of the scariest, yet most important parts of life.  And for members of the church, we get to college and no one's forcing us to go to church anymore.  So when our alarm goes off on Sunday morning, especially if it's at like 9am, we definitely ask ourselves why we want to go and what's the purpose of it.  And if we decide that we don't actually believe in it and don't believe in God or anything, does that mean we're a terrible person?  And do the truths of the gospel extend past the super narrow minds of some of the members and leaders we encounter here in the lovely Provo?  And lots of other super interesting questions.  And I'm not going to pretend like I understand everyone's experiences with this and that I know all about it - HAHAHA yeah no - but I sympathize with the process.  And enjoy talking about it and hearing all different points of view.  (Sorry if it sounds preachy - not my intention at all!!)

So yeah, anyways.  I'm sure there are lots of other things, but I think those are the main ones.  I'm super scared and excited for the ending of this chapter in my life and the start of a new one and what it has in store!  And I'm ridiculously grateful for the experiences that I've had and the amazing support I've received.

ONWARD WE GO!


Oh yeah and here's a video.  Bahahaha sorry I can't get enough of this guy.

Right on.

PODCAST THOUGHTZ IN MAH BRAINZ

Mmmyellowwss!!

So finals are over and organic chemistry is over and graduation is over and I am starting my much less stressful spring term and so now I have time to blog.  And this one is about something I've been thinking about for a bit, but never really had the time to gather my thoughts and write down. 

And also remember that these are just my personal thoughts and I'm not looking to impose them on anyone or attack anyone.  So don't freak out and blow my house up. Calm down.  

Ok, sorry trying to be serious. 

HOKAY. 

So conference was a few weeks ago.  I always really like conference.  I always feel uplifted and recharged and all sorts of good things from it.  And also spending two days in my pajamas at home in stead of at church is fun too.  So, I dunno, if anyone reading doesn't know what conference is, (that's a little optimistic having that many readers, isn't it Stephanie?  I know, Stephanie, but just in case, you know? We are pretty funny.  That's true we are) - mmkay I'm gonna stop talking to myself. 

But yeah, basically click HERE if you don't know what it is.  

So yeah, this conference was good, but I got the feeling that the general theme was basically - this is what the standards are, this is God's way, you can't pick and choose, God is never changing, times are perilous, get your act together.  

And let me just start by saying that I don't think that's wrong - I think our leaders are given significant keys and power from God and there is great wisdom in their words, and the fundamental principles of the gospel are good and God knows what He's doing.  

But I also think that our leaders are human just like us and there is a little more wiggle room than we think in the gospel and how it's taught.  Initially when hearing all these talks where these leaders were really coming down on the definition of a family and virtue and personal worthiness and the ideal family - and being obedient - I felt just kind of overwhelmed.  And kind of unworthy.  I mean, I think messages like that are effective for people who are already really obedient and don't have any problems and agree 100% with all parts of the church.  Mmmmkay that's like, what, .000001% of the church population?  Come on guys.  

While listening, I was thinking just about all the people, like myself, who have made mistakes and who may be struggling with different things, but really do love the gospel and are trying to improve - which I think is a lot of us.  I think a message like that does not help much with the shame that most of us probably already feel.  

...sorry trying to be serious again.

SHAME.  I feel like that is a big feeling for people in the church.  Especially with certain issues that we don't really talk about much in Sunday School.  

I mean, come on people, most people have at least viewed porn some time in their lives and masturbated, (cue huge discussion about mormon sexuality and how we can DRASTICALLY improve that whole area...but yeah maybe another time), and yeah maybe tried some sort of alcohol at some point - whatever, there's a whole spectrum of things that we have done that go against the teachings of the church.  And especially to people who seem to do them more often or have developed some sort of addiction - this message is not exactly motivating.  

And I feel like it's more harmful than helping. 

Just from personal experience, I feel most motivated when I feel loved from my leaders and my Heavenly Father and that I am worth something and that I am ok.  And I think, as a church, we focus most on the - DON'T DO IT - part, rather than the - Ok, you did it, so now what? - part.  

We teach the Atonement and repentance in church and how we are not perfect and that perfection is our ultimate goal, but probably not attainable in this life, and the worth of our souls is great in the sight of God and we are His children and He loves us - but does that message really get through?  Sometimes I feel like we only apply that message to the members of the church who don't do their visiting teaching every month, and maybe skip their scripture reading every once in a while.  

MmmNO.

That's why my mom says there should be a smoking section in the church.  Our church should be "a hospital for sinners, not a museum for saints" - thanks Dear Abby.  Wherever we are in our life, it doesn't change the fact that God thinks the world of us and knows that we can do anything and everything we are destined to do.  And there is a difference between godly sorrow, (feeling sad for your choices that may have be harmful to yourself and to God), and shame, (feeling completely worthless and totally withdrawn from the blessings of God).  

I personally think that the standards of the church are good, some I think personally could be altered in the way they are taught to make it easier, but overall I don't think it's wrong to have those high expectations in the church.  And EVENTUALLY we'll get there.  

But the key is knowing that getting there takes time.  And that we are all at different points in our lives.  And we all have our agency, opinions, and DIFFERENT personally relationships with God and HE is the only one who knows what's best for us.  And the best we can do is love and support each other on our own journeys, and not judge or try to fix them your way.  

And I think, personally, the leaders could have been a little more sensitive about that this past conference and focused more on more motivating aspects of the gospel, like our worth and our Savior and our potential as God's children.  

And going back to the whole sexuality in the church thing, I think a lot of people's shame comes from that.  It's such an important topic and so taboo to talk about that when people actually grow up and discover that their bodies are like - Mmyellowws!  Look at all these sexual feelings and urges! Wooo!! - we don't know what the crap to do with it.  And we become afraid of sex and ignorant about it in stead of learning about it and how to teach our children a healthy view of sexuality while STILL believing in not having sex before marriage and just being smart about it.  There's a reason why Utah has the biggest porn problem.  Just sayin.  

LISTEN TO THE PODCAST!! - Toward Expanding and Improving LDS Discourse about Sexuality

Seriously this podcast about it is awesome and sparked this whole discussion - listen to it, it's worth it and amazing and is way better at discussing it than I am.  Do it. DO IT.  

Aaaanywayysss.  Ok I'm done.  

Nothin like some good ol' Monty Python.  

Las llammasss son mas granddeeee queeeee lass rannassssss!!

Right on.  

My Job, Finals and Stuff

Mmmyelllowwsss again!

I'm writing again! Wooo!!  Mostly just to distract me from my shift.  Time seems to go by faster when I post on my blog...so I'm hoping that will distract me from the fact that my job is terrible and I'm slowing dying inside.  I'm one sassy attitude away from throwing my computer across the room...so yeah let's blog. 

I keep thinking - this is only temporary and I'm totally just paying my dues and my future jobs will be so great in comparison and one day I'll have a job that I just love.  So that sounds good, until I come across dozens of pictures like this:

and this:

and this:

and THIS!

But yeah.  Does not inspire a lot of confidence about having a job.  Maybe I'll just become a hobo.  Or pray for the apocalypse.  Do they have jobs in the apocalypse?  With my luck I'll probably end up in some sort of customer service job of the apocalypse. 

Me: I'm sorry, is there something wrong with your radioactive rat souffle?
Customer: Yes!  I ordered it with pesto sauce!  What are you, an idiot??

Customer: Also my cab it late. 

Anyways.  I could go on about my terrible job, but  I won't put you through that.  And it would probably result in me jumping off a cliff.

So yes!  Other topics!!

I'm graduating soon!!  Well I'm walking at graduation...and then I'll actually be done in June.  But still!  I'm just excited to be done with winter semester - especially organic chemistry.  Oh my gosh don't even get me started.  And physics.  Also don't even get me started.  Because we all know that physics, (especially the circuits/electricity/optics/relativity part) has soooo much to do with exercise science.  And is extremely important to our careers.  And is totally worth the crazy amount of time it takes up in our lives which we would rather be spending on our other classes that matter.  Blehf;lsfjaps;dij.  

Sorry I'm going through caffeine withdrawal - finals and everything.  Don't mind me. 

On a lighter note!  Let me tell you about this man that I see on the bus!

He is a man, probably about 50 or 60  years old.  He has some sort of disability which impairs his walking and talking, I don't know specifically what it is, but he has a job at the Provo library and goes there on the bus every day right about the same time I do.  And he's such a sweet man!  He always smiles at everyone when they get on the bus and is super buds with this one bus driver.  And he reads a bunch a different books on his rides every day.

So for about a week or two, there was this woman and her little 4 year old son who would take the bus from my bus stop every day and I got to know them a bit.  Her son was like the cutest thing ever.  He would always brag about this new batman doll he got that had a batmobile.  Batman is his favorite super hero.  And his favorite color is blue, because that's the color of his eyes and, according to him, your favorite color has to be the color of your eyes.  That's why his brother's favorite color is green. 

So anyway.  Every day we would get on the bus and the man on the bus would just light up like crazy.  The little boy would always run up and say hi to him and show him his batmobile and talk to him.  The man would have the biggest smile I've ever seen, and would respond as much as he could - it would come out just kind of like a moan, but you could tell when he said hi and bye and short words like that.  And when he would get off the bus at the library stop, he would always wave and say bye to the boy and his mom, still smiling as big as ever.  

It was the sweetest thing and I couldn't help smile just as big when I witnessed that.  The boy didn't notice the disability of the man at all, or didn't care if he did, and would brighten his day every day for those 2 weeks.  It makes me wonder at what point in a child's life do they start to notice/care about obvious differences in people's appearances   I remember my sister telling me about one of her boys when he was really young and he was watching a show or something and didn't notice the difference between the black boy and the white boy on the show.  It's pretty amazing how kids can just not really notice those types of things!   

It was such an example too!  I mean because I see this man every day and when I sit down, I see him and sort of smile at him, but mostly just kind of avoid eye contact because I don't want to be awkward or anything, so I just sit and listen to my music.  And it's not like I'm required to like sit down with him and everyone on the bus and become best friends with all of them either - but I mean at least a "hello" wouldn't kill me!  I think sometimes as adults we're kind of trapped by our fear of embarrassment or self-consciousness or getting out of our comfort zone to really reach out to other people.  And I don't think kids, or at least that kid on the bus, have that same barrier.  It really inspires me to be a little less in my personal bubble and reach out.  I guess this is one of the things he was talking about when King Benjamin said to "become as a child".  

So yes.  Lots of warm fuzzies from that.  :)

Here's a video by these guys who make the most hilarious videos.  I've been dying.  

Howz your patience? Bahahahahahaha (don't judge me)

Right on.